Monday, August 15, 2011

You've got to be kidding me!

I have a lot to say about this article but am going to keep my thoughts to myself at the moment.

Anyone else want to chime in?

Edited 8/18/11:

I've gotten several responses via e-mail, text and on Facebook about this.  Everyone I've talked to about it has been pissed off when they read the article.  I was as well.  It actually took me pretty much all day to read it because I would have to stop and take a break when it made me angry.

Ultimately, the remarks that I've received have been that if you don't want the babies don't get pregnant.  As far as I'm concerned, don't go through fertility treatments (where one of the first things they advise you of is the possibility of multiples!).  If you do go through IVF only transfer one egg.  There are ways to avoid multiples in most cases.

As the mother of twins I was really upset about the comment made saying that parents of twins can't give all of themselves to their children.  That their attention would always be divided.  I GIVE ALL OF MYSELF EVERY DAY TO MY CHILDREN.  I have three and I don't think any of them would say that they feel slighted by my having to take care of another child at any given time (that is, if they could talk at the moment =)).  They are all very happy kids and I plan on doing whatever I can to make sure they never feel forgotten or that I am half-assing it with them.  Do I feel guilty at times because I can't change a diaper right away or feed one because I'm dealing with another.  Yes, but that doesn't mean I'm not trying to give everything I have to them.  It's a logistical thing, not an emotional one.

As the friend of several people who have gone through fertility treatments I am pissed for them as well.  I have friends who would give anything to have kids and aren't able to even with fertility treatments, so to hear that people reduce their pregnancies for social reasons is just ridiculous.  These women in the article say that they don't want to say anything because they'll be judged.  Hell, yes, you'll be judged!  If you can't handle taking care of the children that you conceive then don't do it! 

Twins are tough.  Even with a very helpful and supportive partner it is difficult, but I do it.  I do it because I wanted kids and I got twins.  Am I exhausted and at times frustrated?  Absolutely.  Is it tough financially.  Yes!  But I still do it because this is what I chose and what I was given.  No, I didn't do fertility treatments but I don't think it matters.  I wasn't going to reduce because I may have only wanted one.

Ugh, I need to stop or I'm going to get all worked up again.

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